I often work with people who are ‘people pleasers’. Those who’ve become a bit bogged down with things to do because they’ve said “yes!” not one too many times but one hundred too many times.
These people are often the nicest people you’ll meet.
They’re amiable and accommodating. Can’t do enough for you. But underneath all that is someone potentially drowning in obligation, resentment at having been ‘put on’ by everyone, or just simply depressed at what their world has become – very little for themselves but absorbed by everyone else.
Could you be a people pleaser, even just a little?
You’ve got the right heart – but only for others, and not for you maybe?
I was speaking to a client recently who shared they find it very uncomfortable boosting themself up, and in fact even when I praise them they redirect me onto something else… Yet they regularly seek opportunities to boost up others.
So, I suggested it could be a great focus for them to start making their own day. Not instead of trying to make everyone else’s but as well as.
I always say seek out the good – but not to your own detriment. Seek out your good too. Know your strengths as well as others’. Compliment others and compliment yourself.
We seem to have created such an imbalance of negativity towards so much. I mean you just have to look at the world today to see all the negativity out there. How much better would it be if instead, we weighted our focus more toward positivity – to others and to you?
My client said they preferred to be humble – so I asked what humility has to do with being able to tell yourself all the things you’re good at and what makes you a beautiful person. Humility has nothing to do with it. The opposite of humility is cockiness. Going around and telling others all the things you did well, and how great you are. That’s the antithesis of what I’m sharing!
I’m sharing this now because it’s the season, the time of giving and of love, so whatever you do over Christmas – give some to you.
Start making your own damn day!